Why do we need IT Policies and Procedures around Onboarding and Offboarding?

Why do we need IT Policies and Procedures around Onboarding and Offboarding?

Ah. The #1 failure of today’s startup. We at IPSOFACTO can’t believe they don’t teach On/Offboarding Policies and Procedures in startup schools (like Stanford or Berkeley). It’s a historical ‘whatcha don’t know’ kinda problem… Historically, young tech execs….when they were kids, they got a mac….they went to college with a mac, they worked at the cafeteria tables with their teams, slurping java, eating pizza, everyone using Macs. They never needed “IT Support”………… (You know, fat, out of shape white guys who love Windows XP). Anyway, then these youngsters graduated and started companies. And then their companies were 20 employees, with 20 macs, and a buncha stuff all over the cloud, and some app or some process they are working on, and a buncha data…..well….then a bunch of people get fired or quit and a buncha people get hired or promoted and then along comes VC and PE (Private Equity) to talk about investment or sale. The first thing VC/PE says is ‘Tell me how you operate’. Then these young tech execs get to look VC and PE in the eyes, and say….”Well, we’re a buncha folks with a buncha macs doing a buncha stuff. But hey, check out our app and buy us for $30m”. Then the laughter starts. Sad. So. Sad. Anyway, I tell people a tech firm is also like a farm. You can’t just buy some farmland and stick horses, cows, pigs, and chickens on the land and say…”buy my farm”. A farm and a firm are organized- with fences, water, waste, workflow, poop processing… with Policies and Procedures. At the heart of a P&P Manual are the people (your farm animals), and all the rest of the farm is built around their needs; which is why On/Offboarding is tantamount to your eventual sales strategy. From that, IPSOFACTO can design the security and operations for IT strategies, neatly for the long-term sale.

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Steve Boullianne, High school drop-out. College drop-out. A go-go dancer in Amsterdam. LOVED computers, programmed satellites for AT&T. Founded IPSOFACTO in 1996, Y2K boom, Dot-Com boom, 2.0 boom. Likes his smallish company and human relationships; not into big anonymous IT. Loves to tell jokes. Loves and Hates technology; pick up the phone, ok? Thinks on line hook up sites have saved the world from AIDS and DateRape. Thinks his kids are better collaborators and world leaders thanks to video games. Is still a hip-hop dancer; is NOT a Brony. Loves San Francisco; Hates the homeless crisis. Tells young people to buy real estate, as soon as possible. Don’t rent. Hopes his final years are spent handing out blankets, food, clothes, and medical supplies.